Dating Tips : Controversial Issues in Relationships - Why Do We Cheat? By Ahmed Malik and Janet Evans

Controversial issues in relationships are basically what we treat. We know about some of these issues and also talk about them each passing day. For others, we don't really concern ourselves with them but they are little poisonous issues that might seem deadly at the end of the day. Why do we cheat? Ladies, do not look at men and point accusing fingers at them because this issue affects both sexes.
After patiently scrutinizing and researching this issue, it was clear that this thing called cheating accounts for 70% of break-ups in relationships. Ladies do not want to share their man with any body and this means ladies flocking around him pose an aura of confusion and suspicion with question such as 'who is she?'' Also, from the part of the woman, in the past, they tend to find it a big deal to maintain two or more boy friends although these days it is as if they are born to play on men's intelligence or rather, date more than a man at a time. Some say cheating cannot be helped basically because it seem like it is hereditary or inborn. Others say it is greed, mere greed on the cheater. In the course of my research on the subject, I came across a good analysis of why we cheat. It is derived from a movie titled 'why did I get married'? It bases its argument on the issues of 'want' and 'need'. The following are the exceptions:
In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you need and you will hardly get the other 20% that you want in your relationship. There is always another person [man or woman] that you will meet who will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship, and believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship. But the problem is that you will always end up with having the 20% that you want and loosing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had. This mistake is mainly done by woman, letting go of the 80% because of the 20%. Usually , the 20% needed includes money, more outing, and craziness (because good girls love bad boys and bad boys are the ones with flavor and experience) while men attribute the 20% to lack of sex, more sex, present-ability of his lady, dressing and appearance, to mention a few.
Mostly, cheating happens when you start looking for what you don't have. "WOW, this girl in my office is really hot but it's not her features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she also understanding, intelligent, tender. So many things that my spouse is not". Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive, more alluring, more thoughtful, richer, have greater sex appeal... and you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and will look over you more than your spouse ever did. This is because no wife or husband is perfect, because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So, cheating takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing20%. Because your wife or spouse is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling your sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil - cut shirt Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may skip a beat when you meet a big time extrovert who has the makings of a talk show host. But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have or does it look advisable to throw away the 80% that you already have?
Apart from the issue of want and need, distance is also a cause. Some relationships crumble because of distance. When comfort is needed and your spouse is nowhere, when good company is need; when the good and sexy times are a memory and re-living it is a wish, when urges come into place and your spouse is nowhere around to quench the fire... solace will now be found in the person who keeps you in good company in the absence of your boo. Some also put trust as an excuse even in the distance. "Well I don't know what he is doing at the moment wherever he is. So let me enjoy my time" or "only God knows if she is faithful to me alone or she is flirting" are some of the questions that open doors to cheating.
This thing called cheating has eaten into the fabric of relationship that even in some marriages, such still happens. Then where does the beauty of relationship lie? Why does it have to be so? The deed has been done; it is the way forward that needs to be brought forward and quick before more harm is done.
Working on the issue of want and need and having a basis that is more to be lost if the relationship fizzles out might help. Add to your spouse's 80% to make the 100% that represents what you wish to have in your dream relationship having in mind the good times spent together; the unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple, the many adjustments you have made to love the other: the wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers... Cheating sets in when you start looking for what you don't have. Be faithful and thankful for what you already have. Trust more and drill your spouse to know what he/she needs that you lack in your trivial. It is really a need and not a trivia. Be contented with what you have. Share and don't compare yours to others. Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he's missing? Oh, they have got more leg room; oh my god their food is so different from ours; their seats recline at an 80 degree angle and they've got personal videos; do you know that there are many first class Passengers who are miserable in first class because they are not riding in a private Lear jet?
If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are, you are first class, 20/80 or 80/20. you determine your lot in your relationship and life. Enjoy what you have or share and be happy about it because when it is out of your hands....you know the rest!!!
For more information on relationship problems, meeting. dating and seducing women visit:http://e-guidedating.blogspot.com/
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ahmed_Malik
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Dating Tips: What dating is all about?

A teacher was lecturing his pupils about dating and sex education and it's safety. In the course of the dating and sex education tips, He asked a leading question: " What dating is all about?
One of the pupils responded that, Dating is all about Date Sexy Women, dating e-guide, hot babe, hot girls , dating e-guide, hot girls ,relationships, sex, tips, boyfriend, date,girl friends, suger mum, sugar day and above all, disasters!
Readers, do you agree? Drop your comments.
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Getting Over Being Dumped: Tips for Coping with the End of a Relationship

From time to time, relationships go badly wrong. Most of us have been abandoned by a partner at some stage ion life. If not then you are very lucky. It is easier to leave someone than be dumped yourself but if you have been left, then you need to take your time and have a period of mourning before dating again. If a major relationship has ended it will take some time to recover and anyone who suggests you just bounce back is a fool as they are not in touch with the reality of the situation.
Do rely on good friends and do find time for yourself but ultimately it is time that will sort things out for you. Distance from the event and plenty of thinking and pondering will help put things in perspective but I will say that it is generally the case that that particular relationship didn't work out because there are far better things in store for you. If that relationship didn't end, how would you ever go on to meet Mr. or Miss Right?
Accept what has happened and do not try to win your ex back
Never go back to someone once they have left you, it won't work
Take some time out from socializing to get to grips with what has happened
Make time for yourself to do some thinking
Never allow your ex to suggest you will both be good friends
Don't get in touch with, or try and see your ex to sort things out as you are fooling yourself. Once someone has taken such a major step it is usually for good
Remove anything in your apartment that reminds you of them. Have a spring clean
Do not allow your ex back into your house, it's over
If you had shared friends, it will be a difficult period. Be prepared that some people will fall by the way side
Do rely on your best friends for comfort and they should allow you to talk as much as you need.
As soon as you can, come to terms with the loss and realize that you are not going to be single again forever. That will not happen
Do everything you can to rebuild your self confidence and demonstrate to yourself what your ex lost
Never blame yourself. If someone left you it was purely their decision. If they couldn't communicate with you prior to the event it was their own failing
If your ex was unfaithful if has nothing to do with your own bedroom prowess. More their lack of self-respect
Though it is a powerful mood, do not harbor grudges and desire revenge too much. Hurting someone brings you down to their level. The best revenge is in bouncing back and demonstrating how much they actually lost
Learn from the failed relationship, not only about yourself but about what you will never accept again in future dating needs
Lose the photographs. There is no comfort to be found there
Do allow yourself to be angry for a short time. In doing so you will feel empowered to move on
Being rejected hurts so don't allow anyone to tell you otherwise
When you are ready do start socializing again even if dating is some way off
Don't start a new relationship on the rebound, it is highly likely to fail and you will hurt the new person too
Hold your head up high and think only of positive things where possible
Sometimes it is necessary to move location or job to recover. If this is the case, it will herald a fresh start
Don't email/phone your ex or look for reasons because you will often be lied too. They will try and spare your feelings (laughably) by avoiding what they really think
Take a vacation if you can and get a wider sense of perspective. This includes meeting new people and making new friends
Don't go to your old haunts secretly hoping to run into your ex. That is a recipe for disaster and will prolong the healing process
Eventually, do treat yourself and buy new clothes and even change your image slightly to get a fresh feel for things. A new haircut can do wonders and instill a new sense of confidence
Be patient and take your time with anything. Ultimately in the years that follow you will feel strong and confident and will go on to have a beautiful relationship. Just thank your lucky stars it wasn't with the fool who just walked out the door
Never make rash decisions in the days after being dumped. This is not the time for clarity of judgment. Your friends will help you.
Source: http://www.topdatingtips.com/dumped-tips.htm

13 Types of Girls you should Avoid

In general, men are looking first for physical attraction at a woman.
Many of them consider that if she is beautiful and well dressed, its
the perfect partner they are looking for. But they don't know that
behind this appearance its hiding something worst.
Maybe this happened to you too. After you began a relationship with her
you found out that she is not exactly what you want and what you
expect. She hurt you and dumped you when you last expected. Many men
are chasing after a woman who lied them and used them. But, in order to
stop this, you should know from the beginning which types of girls you
should avoid for to not be hurt again.

Desperate girl
-it is the type of the girl who spend all her life laid out, looking
for a perfect life, and suddenly she discover that she gets old and she
doesn't get married yet because she hasn't met the perfect man for her
-she wants desperately to get married no matter who the guy is or what
he does
-she is pressed by the time and is ready to marry with a jerk as long
as he has marriage material
-watch out because if you marry one of this, you have to spend the
rest of your life with her

Materialistic girl
-usually is good looking and well dressed
-is looking very well outside but inside it is a bunch of money hungry
taker
-she is looking all the time after boys which are staying very well
with their wallet
-she expects that a man should finance her entire life just because she
is biologically female
-she is very friendly, nice at the beginning but after some time you'll
see that no matter how much you give her, she wants more
-she is greed personified
-she is interested only in what she wants and not others feelings
-stay away from this kind of girl because she will dumped you after she
spend all your money

Angry girl
-she is the type of the girl which sees life like a battle
-anything what is happening or is told to her is seen as a insult at
her address
-has also a bad opinion about man, sees only the wrong sides of a man
-she is always upset and angry
-usually she likes to take out of context everything what is said to
her and to interpret the words like she wants
-you don't have any future with her, she has a simmering anger at men
which can explode at any moment

Insecure girl
-she is very nice and treats men very well
-but she suffers by frustration
-is wracked by anxiety about making the wrong decision
-she has to think twice about what to do, what to wear, where to go,
what to eat
-she needs constant reassurance that she's attractive and worries
incessantly

Stupid girl
-this type of girl likes to speak a lot but she doesn't say nothing
smart
-she likes to say always gossips about the others, but when you want to
talk something important with her, she is not able to make conversation

Uptown girl
-she is very rich
-everything she has is better than yours and she wants to make sure
that you know it
-she only dates the best of best
-is entirely focused on herself
-she is very selfish, self-indulgent grown up as '' daddy's little
girl''
-needs to be constant center of attention no matter what she does or
where she goes

Childish girl
-everything in life hurts this kind of girl
-is the type of girl who cries a lot, every innocent comment or
criticism will upset her
-avoid this kind of girl because if you are dating one you will have to
spend all the time apologizing even if you didn't make any mistake
-avoid also long term relationship with her because she is capable of
suicide if you want to leave her and all the blame will be thrown on
yourself

Elusive girl
-is the type of girl who is afraid to start a relationship
-she might be hurt in a past relationship and so subconsciously avoids
or sabotages new relationships in the present
-she look interested at the beginning but after a while she runs away
-is the type of girl who likes to send mixed messages so you'll never
understand her

Talking girl
-it is a big difference between somebody who is able to make good
conversation and have sense of humor , and somebody who always have to
make a comment about everything
-it is the type which is very hard to please and always has to say
something about everything is happening or speaking around her

Romantic girl
-this lives in her own world, of movies and romance novels
-she is very dreamy, imagining things, expecting Prince Charming to
come after her
-she doesn't know how the real world is
-she was grown with the idea that she is a princess

Dragger girl
-this kind of girl will always make you feel bad even there is no
reason to feel that
-it is always worrying and she can never be happy, everything around
her is a total drag
-even if a wonderful thing happen to you, she will make you feel like
it was the worst thing that could happen ever

Controlling girl
-she likes to have the total control in your relationship and on you
too
-wants to control you in everything you do, you wear or eat
-if you try to control her too, she will get angry, cry, scream or use
any deceptive female tactic until you give up

Flirting girl
-she flirts with anybody and flaunt her sexuality at every opportunity
-has a big power of attraction
-exist the risk to dump you in any moment if somebody better comes
along
With all these types of girls you should avoid, it is now more easy for
you to make a good choice about your next girlfriend; but remember
that not all the women are the same, maybe there is somewhere a good,
carrying woman just for you.

Article Source: UnArchived Articles

Chatting up Girls - Teach yourself How To Become A Man Of Mystery

The science of seduction is an area of life which put most men to great challenges, even the most experienced of guys, especially when it comes to the very initial time. This is why most men surf the internet for the easiest ways to chat up and seduce hot girls into going on a date with them. Below are some of the rules which determine success or failure with seduction method.

If you plan to chat up girls without rejection then you need to belief in yourself with confidence, and maintain that you have what it takes to seduce beautiful girls. The fact is beautiful, sexy women are attracted to men of courage regardless of looks. So if you aren't confident enough, this is a skill you can learn and get used to.

The kind of cloth you wear and how you present yourself is very important. You must look nice and seductive. Failure to be well presented will see you falling at the first hurdle. They'll completely avoid you, and move on to more handsome looking men who have taken the time to keep their looks.

Chat up girls by making direct eye contact tol establish far greater sincerity. Make use of your eyes to almost hypnotise the hot woman in front of you. Look deeply into her eyes and confidently praise how amazing she looks.

As you chat up girls, mention their stunning clothes, or whatever else strikes you, as a sincere and honest compliment at that time. Be positive and sincere to cast a positive first impression on any hot girl, and she'll find herself desperate and willing to date you.

The formular, however is FUN - Having fun is what makes flirting exciting. So if you are dating sexy women but you aren't having fun doing it, it's not really flirting. chatting up girls successfully, treat your flirting as though you're like Salvador of second Chance - where relationships are about fun, games, excitement and mystery. The goal is to make the girl want you not the other way round.

It is realy safe to say, these tips will help you become the centre of attraction for all of the sexy girls and hot women any time you approach them.

The key to any pick up is based on you initiating the conversation and to find out how click here

Your past relationship - Does it Bother your Boyfriend?

What your boyfriend wants to think about is another guy having been with you (whether we're talking about sex or just hooking up). Imagining some other guy getting down with you can literally drive him crazy.
Have you had a worrisome sexual history that's filled with lots of experience? If that is so, your boyfriend might have trouble dealing with this. But this is something that he must accept.
Don't you dare let someone else throw your past at your face or hold it against you. If it's in the past (or only a few months ago), let it stay there, and move on.
He must accept you for all that you are. If he's chosen to be with you...he needs to accept you for all that you are. And that means everything. It doesn't really mean he has to like your sexual history, of course, but it means he can't hold it or use it against you. It's completely unfair for him to want to date you and then start knit-picking about details from your past.
If he's doing this, tell him flat out that he's going to have to accept everything about you if he wants to date you. Let him know he has two choices:
a) Breaking up
b) Staying together. but he can never mention your sexual past ever again. Never. Not even when you two are quarreling.
Learn from your mistakes and move on.The few moments of pleasure that come from sex and hooking up can have a permanent effect on you reputation and self-esteem. If you've chosen to change your "free loving" ways, you're doing the right thing and that's what matters most. On the other hand, if you’ve only had a few hookup and your man is making a major issue about it, you might want to rethink whether you really need to date such a puritanical person.

Self confidence as it relates to dating.

For a long lasting dating or marriage relationship, one should have genuine belief in oneself no matter the problem. If it sound like it is easy to do, how many of us truly believe in ourselves? It is not about being conceited and boastful nor something more humble and sincere. Having genuine beliefs in our-selves encompass the following:

1. Self-Confidence
2. Knowing Yourself
3. Knowing Your Strengths
4.Loving Yourself
5. Standing Up For Yourself
6. Recognizing Your Weaknesses
7. Standing Up For What You Believe In

With all these at the back of your heart, there is nothing stopping you from excelling in your relationship.

10 Golden Rules For Successful Dating

As everyone knows, the favourite method of mating and dating for singletons the world over is to join an online dating site. But what most people don't realise is that only around 10% of dating site members actually meet a long-term partner on their chosen site and a whopping 70% don't even receive one message from another member. If you follow the 10 simple steps outlined below, you too can join the 10% who find love and romance on line.
1. Choose the right site. The boom in online dating has provided a plethora of choice for consumers but you should take a few moments to decide on the type of partner you're looking for, not to mention the town or city where you would prefer him/her to be located. There are niche sites which cater to all sectors (single parents, bikers, gay people etc) and general sites which welcome all comers just as there are city or country specific sites and sites with a global perspective. Choosing the right site for you is probably the most important decision you'll make when looking for a partner on line.
2. Choose a great username. First impressions always last and the on line identity which you give yourself is the first thing that other members will see before they check-out your profile. 'Funny' works, 'cryptic' works and you wont go far wrong even if you decide to use your own christian name; but if you go down the smutty or sexually suggestive route (which a lot of guys seem to do), you'll find that other members will give you a wide berth.
3. Upload a photo. This is crucial as a significant percentage of people only search for members who have bothered to include a pic; you want to see what other members look like so it stands to reason that other people will feel the same way about you. If the only photo you have isn't particularly flattering, you can always mention that in your profile - it's still better than no photo at all.
4. Complete your profile. There's nothing more off-putting than a profile which screams "I can't be bothered to do this properly". If you don't have time to complete all the categories when you are signing-up, then make the time to do so at the earliest opportunity.
5. Be upbeat and positive. If you're feeling a little down or lacking in confidence, now isn't the time to say so when you're writing a description of yourself. If you come across as confident, happy and full of fun, you'll get much more attention than if you come across as mono-syllabic or down in the dumps. And remember, humour is a real ice-breaker and a great aphrodisiac.
6. Widen your search criteria. If you generally go for people who have blonde hair, blue eyes and are between 5'4" and 5'6" and you narrow your search down to just these specifics, then you may be missing out on a great many other members who you'll also find just as attractive. To start with, just search by gender, age and location and that way you'll be giving yourself the widest possible choice.
7. Don't automatically dismiss people. If you receive a message from someone who's profile you like but who hasn't bothered to include a photo, you should still write back and ask them to send a pic to your regular email address. You'll find that many people are more willing to do this than post a pic for all and sundry to look at.
8. Use all the features on offer. Many sites provide a great deal more than just an internal emailing system. Some sites might include voice messaging whilst others enable members to chat and flirt in 'real time' with other members and the more you take advantage of everything that's available to you, the more chance you have of making contact with someone special.
9. Be proactive. Once you've registered and completed your profile, don't wait for others to make contact with you. When you spot someone who you think might be a good fit with yourself, write to them and introduce yourself. And don't just say 'Hi, I like your profile', tell them why you've written to them and point out the things that you believe you have in common. A long opening message will create a much better impression than a short, perfunctory one.
10. Check back with the site. Most popular dating sites have new people joining all the time so remember to log-in at least once every day to view the most recent members and you can then contact anyone you like the look of before others get the chance to do so. Also, you should remember that on most sites, the members who log-in the most appear higher up the search listings than those who don't so your profile will be easier to spot by people with whom you might be compatible.
So there you have it - successful online dating is not rocket science; it just takes a bit of thought and a bit of effort and if you adhere to the 10 rules that I have outlined above, then your personal life will soon receive the kick-start it deserves.